A Mind-Packer

wishes list-several things i (recently) want part II

Farah Fadilla — Tue, 22 Dec 2009 17:03:58 +0000

postingan kali ini terinspirasi dari postingan saya terdahulu yg ternyata saya buat di bulan desember tahun lalu (2008), berarti tepat satu tahun dari sekarang. hmm, saya mulai berpikir utk membuat kegiatan menulis wishes list menjadi ritual tahunan saya. yaa siapa tahu bisa memotivasi saya untuk menabung atau mewujudkan semua yg ada di daftar ini. untuk tetap menjunjung tinggi keadilan, saya tdk akan menulis angkat urut pada setiap benda/kegiatan yang menjadi wishes saya. semua saya inginkan dan semua saya harapkan menjadi kenyataan. okay, here they are:

weekend: simple, I want to meet someone this weekend, next weekend, the weekend after, hmm, every weekend. no need further explanation, I guess. thus, I want this weekend to come faster (ga bisa siy, tp gpp lah yaa biar ga kerasa lamanya). bagaimana dengan anda, senor?

job: wow! yg ini msh harap2 cemas proses menunggunya. hmm, ingin sekali punya penghasilan sendiri dan ga perlu minta uang jajan lg ke mama papa. oooh dan saya mulai keseringan mager, wahh gawattt si berat badan pasti ikut2an naik jg. mungkin kata2 hoping for the best preparing for the worst sangat cocok utk situasi saat ini. *fingercross*

holidays with family: yaa walaupun every day is a holiday for me right now, me still want to go on vacation with my lovely mom, dad, and brother. sbnrnya ada rencana buat januari taun depan ini, semoga bisa terwujud, amiiin. sudah lama tdk jalan2 jauh sekeluarga, hmm, eh terakhir bulan agustus kmrn deng sbnrnya, tp itu sekalian beribadah. anyway, yeaaay! holidaaay! *woot*

good hair means good mood: rasanya sudah berabad-abad saya tidak melakukan perawatan rambut di salon. terakhir kali ke salon, hmm, waktu wisuda. itu jg bukan untuk perawatan tapi untuk “perusakan” demi tampil berbeda dan cantik di malam syukuran dan hari wisuda. jadi saya ingin sekali pergi ke salon utk creambath dan merapikan rambut saya yg sudah mulai bercabang-menyebalkan-karena-ujung-rambut-saya-jd-orens-gajelas. ooh dan klo sempet saya ingin facial juga, demi wajah yg lebih cerah, bersinar, dan sedap dipandang.

new year’s eve: yapp tdk terasa skrg sudah mendekati akhir tahun 2009, yg berarti akan ada perayaan berakhirnya masa jaya 2009 untuk menyambut kehadiran 2010. malam tahun baru kali ini mgkn akan kembali saya lewatkan bersama teman2, tapi sepertinya beda dengan geng tahun lalu (eaaa macam anak SMA labil aja nyebutnya geng). hmm, tp entah kenapa tahun ini saya ingin sekali melihat kembang api.

gladiator heels: i don’t know for sure why I want this shoes. let’s say, I just suddenly want it.

kindergarten teacher: uh ooh, I always like kids. their white “tembem” cheeks, their cute smiles, their tiny body, their innocent faces, etc. woow! that’s the reason why I also always want to be a kindergarten teacher. yapp yapp to get closer with all those cute kids!

last but not least, madrid!: hahaha okay this one is long term wish, I think. yaiyalaaah, emgnya sini punya pohon duit bisa langsung jalan2 ke madrid kyk jalan2 ke mall. jadi, mari menabung untuk madrid kapan2 (entah kapan)!

p.s. sekian wishes list saya taun ini. jumlahnya mgkn terlihat tdk banyak, but trust me what you read is only a tip of an iceberg. artinya, saya sbnrnya banyak mau. hohoho. oiya, sdkt review utk wishes taun lalu. semuanya tercapai, kecuali nomer 1 itupun bukan bnr2 tdk tercapai, cuma beda merk dan tipe aja. heey, bahkan yg nomer 8 jg tercapai lho. *big grin*

blank pages for some new stories

Farah Fadilla — Wed, 02 Dec 2009 06:39:55 +0000

howdy! we meet again. it’s been a looong time since i wrote the last post about my best friend. hasil riset yang saya lakukan sendiri telah berhasil membuktikan bahwa TA telah berhasil membuat mood menulis saya turun drastis tanpa adanya tanda-tanda untuk kembali ke titik normal. mungkin riset saya terdengar tidak valid *yaiyalah, samplenya saya doang*, tp tdk apa2. riset itu cukup valid kok untuk saya sendiri. lalu kenapa saya kembali menulis? hmm, saya menganggap kembalinya saya menulis sebagai suatu tuntutan kondisi. okay, singkat cerita, stlh lulus saya memang blm diterima bekerja di mana2. tp saya tidak berkecil hati. mencari pekerjaan itu menurut saya sama saja seperti mencari pasangan. jd yaa cocok2an, hoki2an, jodoh2an, dan yaa rejeki2an. kuncinya mesti berusaha tp ttp diiringi dengan bersabar dan percaya klo rejeki dan jodoh itu di tangan Tuhan. *okay saya mulai sok bijak*. hmm,intinya, saya masih menikmati masa2 “pengangguran-banyak-acara” saya, jadi mari menulis lagi.

baiklah, cukup sudah kata pengantarnya. mari kembali ke gaya menulis semula. di postingan pertama setelah berbulan-bulan ga ngepost ini, gw akan sdkt mereview kejadian di bbrp bulan belakangan smpe sekarang. intinya (lagi), sdh cukup banyak kejadian yang menyenangkan atau kurang menyenangkan atau tidak menyenangkan sm sekali sejak bulan juni (postingan terakhir) smpe bulan desember ini. nanti lah yaa dikit2 gw bahas di postingan2 berikutnya. skrg udh terlalu siang, gw harus siap2 ke gambir. yaap, debby prazna okky akan dtg ke jkt. kenapa okky ke jkt? krn besok kami akan ke bdg untuk liburan sekaligus Gengmu Reunion.

hmm, segitu dlu lah yaa. doakan saja mood menulis saya seperti ini terus, jd bsk2 saya akan ngepost dg gambar2 yang jauh lebih seru.

(a)marah

Farah Fadilla — Sun, 07 Jun 2009 08:55:51 +0000

kmrn abis ngbrl2 sm seorang tmn, hmm, mgkn lebih tepatnya dgrin dia curhat. kirain tentang percintaan, yaa standar lah ya. tp ternyata dia malah curhat ttg persahabatan. hmm, hal yg mnrt gw udh jarang dibahas aja, abis biasanya klo lo dan sahabat lo udh sahabatan lama, you both have already known how to deal with any problem in your friendship. hm, dia crt ada sahabatnya yg ngambek sm dia krn ada kaitannya dg masalah percintaan. menurut si tmn gw itu, biasanya sahabatnya emg kdg2 ngambek, tp yg ini siy ktnya terlama dan terparah.

hmm, then i asked my friend to tell me about the details why it happened. yaa stlh diceritain, gw siy mikirnya si sahabatnya ga bener2 marah atau gimana2, hm, tipikal cewek aja, yg kadang lbh milih buat diem dan ngambek dibanding hrs crt apa yg sbnrnya ada di benak mrk. berharap klo si sahabat (cowok)nya bisa nebak2 dan nyimpulin sndr knp dia ngambek, trus minta maaf atau ngasi penjelasan. mgkn si cewek ga maksud buat ngambek atau marah, dia cm gamau aja si sahabat cowoknya itu knp2 cm gara2 urusan percintaan. yaa saking carenya sm si sahabat, dia akhirnya malah jd kesel sndr, yauda deh jd ngambek.

gw mikir kyk gt bkn tanpa alasan. soalnya, me as a girl sometimes did that too. baru2 ini si sahabat jg lg knp2 sm pacarnya. krn satu dan lain hal, gw suka geregetan sndr sm dia. abis kyknya pasrah sekali ya. i’m actually sure that my friend has own reasons to act like that, somehow i do choose to be a pasrahan person, tapi kmrn2 itu agak ga pas aja. geregetan sndr aja liat dia jd gloomy, sedih2an, dan kyknya capek gitu mukanya gara2 kebanyakan pikiran.

mgkn alasan itu yg kdg bikin cewek2 suka ngambek2 sndr sm sahabat cowoknya. kdg hal2 kyk gt dianggep simple sm cowok, tp cewek kan kdg2 lbh peka, dan keseringan pake perasaan, jd deh mrk bs ngambek gara2 hal kecil. atau mgkn krn si sahabat ngebatalin janji, atau dia merasa si sahabat ga pernah ngajak jalan2, atau bahkan (sedikit) jealous krn si sahabat udh pnya kehidupan percintaan atau kesibukan lain yg akhirnya bikin dia merasa tersisih alias dinomerduakan. cm mrk gengsi aja blg gt, makanya deh misuh2 sendiri.

tp namanya jg cewek. dg permintaan maaf serta bujuk rayu buat ga ngulangin lg, biasanya siy bisa luluh. lagipula masa siy marah beneran sm sahabat sendiri dan mana bisa siy marah lama2 sm org penting yg slalu ada dan siap buat kita anytime anywhere. ya kan?

universe

Farah Fadilla — Wed, 03 Jun 2009 18:38:01 +0000

dear H,

i was just wondering about what we were talking about tonight and several days ago. here are some analogies which pop-up from our mind about you-know-what topic we always discussed lately.

“bumi hrs mengitari matahari. coba bayangin klo bumi ga lg mengitari matahari”

“hrsnya kyk sesama planet aja, jd ga saling mengitari, tp berputar beriringan”

then i suddenly thought, that’s nature and that’s how it should happen. on the other hand, what are we? we are human. we have something whether those planets don’t, something we called it heart.

then i remembered about ‘chance’. every person gets one best chance, and every person deserves a second chance. just dont miss it, or let it go without any effort.

hmm, then forgiveness thingy also comes to my mind. forgive to be forgiven. yapp just like the old quotes: treat others just like the way you want others to treat you.

everyone has their own version of happiness. that makes people dont always get what they want, because happiness comes with so many different ways and forms. however, you’ll know when it comes to you one day. so do i. then you dont have to worry that much, hm? i’ll always be fine.

p.s.: this is just a short message for you, H. think about it and follow your heart, okay? i’ll be here to listen, and always ready to catch you just in case you will fall down. just like i said before, it’s only a short message for one of the most important people in my life, who deserves every single happiness in this universe. anyway, i believe you can do it!! semangattt! 5,9 is no big deal right? hehehe

-W-

it is called colorgenic

Farah Fadilla — Tue, 19 May 2009 18:19:31 +0000

*terinspirasi dari blog irsyad. harusnya dicoba sejak long weekend kmrn di jkt. tp laptop si papa ga bs mengakses*

it is called ColorGenic.

Name: dilla
Date: 5/19/2009
Colorgenics Number: 14523607

You are seeking an affectionate relationship, offering fulfilment and happiness. You are capable of powerful emotional enthusiasm. Deep down, you are a kind loving person, always helpful and willing to adapt yourself if necessary to realise the bond of affection that you desire. But you need the same consideration and understanding from others and it is this need that will sometimes hold you back… so let go, trust and you may pleasantly surprised at what happens.

You are working extremely hard trying to improve your image in the eyes of others. You are looking for acknowledgement from your peers and those who come into your sphere of influence. You want to be liked, not for what people think of you but for what you really are.

You are confined and trapped in a distressing or uncomfortable situation and seeking some way out. Whatever you seem to do to resolve the problem hasn’t worked out. Fortunately you are able to gain some aspect of relief from someone close to you.

You are being unduly influenced by the situation that is all around you. You do not like the feeling of loneliness and whatever it is that seems to separate you from others. You know that life can be wonderful and you are anxious to experience life in all its aspects, to live it to the full. You therefore resent any restriction or limitations that are being imposed on you and you insist on going it alone.

You wish to be left in peace… no more conflict and no more differences of opinion. In fact you just don’t want to be involved in arguments of any shape or form. All you want is for ‘them’ to get on with it – and to leave you alone.

*sebagian besar, benar adanya. sebagian lagi nyerempet2 dikit. hmmhmm*

ps. tp kok hasil yg kamu panjang banget siy, H?

goodnight and go

Farah Fadilla — Mon, 18 May 2009 04:31:41 +0000

there are so many things happened in my daily life recently. the latest one was the emergency meeting between me and my closest (best)friends at starbucks this evening. i dont know why, but i actually didnt care about it. i mean, come on, i wasnt surprised. i actually had some scenarios which i didnt share with anyone but myself. called it cenayang or ‘feeling’ (i like to call it instinct), but yess, i had already predicted it since long long long time ago.
maybe i should listen to what irsyad said about the situation, especially my good-nice-angelic behavior during the situation. then, today, i just realize, irsyad was correctly right. maybe i should be the devilish girl once.

so, for YOU, out there. just go! leave us alone. thank you.
if only i could turn back time, maybe we just shouldnt meet.

ps. this blog was written yesterday, but since i had problem with the interenet connection, i just post it today.

buat smua yg kmrn ada di starbucks (juga buat yg ga dtg karna satu dan lain hal), there’s nothing i could say to you, all. nothing but only THANK YOU SO MUCH!

love you all dearest (best)friends!

weirdo weekend

Farah Fadilla — Sat, 09 May 2009 19:06:38 +0000

WHY?

wecause whis weekend wis weird! wahahahaa okay, rewind, aneh banget smuanya pake huruf depan W.

okayy, hmm, because so many need-to-be-highlighted things happen in this 3 days (random order):

1. many many many many stories. irsyad, primo, kalman with different types of happy-sad-sweet-bitter-yet nice to listen stories (good luck for the love life, you guys!!).

jgn bosen ya klo aku curhat dan nangis ke kalian trus labil karna seneng-sedih ga karuan

2. bertha’s new gadget (baca: BB). yeahh!! and okky’s unfinished stories.

3. private plurks. hahaha love you plurkers. very entertaining dan menghilangkan stress.

4. i bought some books! oooh guilty pleasure niy, since there are still tons of assignments to do.

5. company visit to HM Sampoerna at Pacific Place. meet director of corporate affairs (Mr. Yos Ginting). super ngefans!

6. a week after terrible week, last week. *no need further explanation. too exhausting and too sad to be told)

7. still have EMS assignment to do, tp dr td malah nulis2 nyiapin postingan ini.

8. “sudden-short-as-normal-as-before yet no goodbye” late night conversation. speechless

9. batal nonton Momento dg alasan tampaknya tdk perlu karna takut smua masa lalu muncul lg di depan muka. klo kata orang jaman dlu: mencegah lbh baik drpd mengobati. thuuus, i decided to not to go there at all.

10. last but not least, yg membuat lengkap keunikan weekend ini: Bayu ‘pak CEO’ Ardhyanto shared some stories, too. wooow after all this time. udh lama ga dicurhatin sm pak boss. hahaha

aaakhh! me need longer weekend!! huhuhu

London-my dream city!!

Farah Fadilla — Sat, 09 May 2009 15:20:12 +0000

after thinking and considering several things (and of course talking with my mom and dad), i think i decide to continue my study in US or UK. yeaaiiy! LONDON! actually i changed my mind at first, since UK is very very very far away and there were some reasons which i can’t mention here. but then, i recently change my mind (again). maybe i should go there. why not, huh?

moreover, after long and funny discussion with mr.Kalman Wijaya (pharmacist and owner of Cooking Kalman-red), i think i’ll take IOP as my subject to take. ooh btw, IOP stands for Industrial and Organization Psychology. since i really want to take the major which concerning about people and human relation and IOP sounds interesting. *thank you sooo much, brother! good luck with the cooking thingy to your cem-ceman, hahaha*

anywaaaay, klo aku jd ke sana, jenguk2 yaa, teman-teman! hahaha

p.s. this plan is still changeable plan. i still dont know what will happen in the future *yaiyalaaah!*.yaa lagian syp tau diantara lo smua-my dearest friends-ada yg ga rela gw pergi jauh2. hahaha *GR abiiisss!*

gpp deh, yg penting punya rencana dlu. hmmhmm.

lift me high, throw me to the ground.

Farah Fadilla — Thu, 07 May 2009 17:31:57 +0000

some words, in one sentence.

describe all, describe everything.

is it the reason behind your presence?

yapp at least that’s what i’m thinking.

my life recently

Farah Fadilla — Sun, 03 May 2009 16:10:05 +0000

what did happen in the last few weeks and several days?

assignment, assignment, and more assignments. nyadar siy pasti ga sehectic anak2 brand comm dan mene, tp tetep aja namanya assignment.

friendship bracelet. haha udh kyk home industry aja, smua orang lg seneng belajar bikin gelang2 dr benang sulam. gw? bikin jg, walopun br pnya bbrp. lumayan lah.

this roller coaster-look-a-like feeling. naik turun naik turun dg kecepatan yg smakin ga menentu. bikin deg2an, perut dan hati ngilu, kepala pusing, mata sembab karna nangis ketakutan daaan kuping orang2 panas karna gw teriak panik terus. ooh one thing, last wednesday and thursday were the two worst days ever *at least for the last one year*. those two little rivers just kept falling down, i didnt even know how to stop. bunches of thanks for my dearest friends. all of you. i didnt know what would happen if you guys weren’t there to catch me from falling. however, i just can say friday night was unpredictable yet sweet.

then, i remember something. i did write a poem, i forgot the exact time i wrote it. so, maybe it is okay if i just post it now.

another untitled

do you mind, if i ask you what is it actually on your mind?
i don’t think i can see, it is because i’m blind
i only hear your voice and only feel your presence
can you tell what is it all about in one sentence?

mirror mirror hanging in the wall
could you tell me when actually he will call?
will he just let me fall?
or will he take me to the hall?
and let me have just one dance
the dance that we will do at glance
i will always memorize that night
the night when you will hold me tight
sometimes i don’t think that moment will come
just like another dream, you get some then you lose some

may i ask you something?
some things which i’ve been thinking
can we be together?
just in case i need you to stay here forever
or can i still memorize your smile?
even we are far away in mile
or maybe i still can keep my dream
that someday we will be at the same team

last but not least. i am happy. dad, mom, brother, thanks for the wonderful sunday! love youu!

hm, td abis dgrin cd vierra. ada lirik lagu yg nyantol.